Building up courage to serve

A friend recently got into a car accident.  Everyone was fine, but their car isn't functional.  I was concerned for her, but wasn't sure how to help.  I texted to see if they were all doing alright, and she let me know about the situation.

I felt strongly that I should help.  Since withdrawing from medical school, I've had significant doubts about my ability to accomplish things.  So, I had a bit of doubt about whether I could handle fulfilling any offer that I made.  After all, Sarah was away for her grandfather's funeral, I was watching our kids, I was sick, and several assignments were due soon.

My feelings were clear, though, that the kind of person I want to be is the kind that helps when my friends are in need.  However, these feelings were accompanied by the anguish of knowing I'm not the invincible person I used to think I was.  Do I have it in me to actually fulfill an offer to help?

I remembered the teachings of King Benjamin in the Book of Mormon, where he teaches his people, "And behold, I tell you these things that ye may learn wisdom; that ye may learn that when ye are in the service of your fellow beings ye are only in the service of your God."  I remembered the teachings of Jesus in the New Testament, where he says, "Verily I say unto you, Inasmuch as ye have done it unto one of the least of these my brethren, ye have done it unto me."

My self doubt and anxiety would get in the way of my successfully serving others.  But this time, I decided not to let that happen.  I texted her and offered to drive her kids to school the next day.

She didn't take me up on the offer.  However, I'm grateful for the positive influence that my memory of these scriptures had on me.  I overcame the fear I felt and made a sincere offer to help, ready to overcome the weaknesses that would otherwise inhibit my ability to succeed at the task.

It may not sound like much, especially since she didn't take me up on the offer.  For me, though, it took some soul searching to make the offer.  I'm a better person for the decision I made, and hope that future offers to help will come more readily.

Update:  My heart goes out to her family.  The situation seems to be getting worse.  She finally did take us up on the offer, and I don't know what she would do without it.  Serving has made me feel grateful to be in a position where I'm capable to do so, and so very sorry for the troubles the family is facing right now.